I know it’s been like forever since I’ve posted, so I’m coming out of hiding because this past weekend is deserving. I could probably write an entire book about it, but I’ll spare you all.
This may be a long post. Be warned. I have a lot in my head that is just itching to get out.
So a summary: I was baptized, I had the best surprise of my life. Not in that order. Intrigued? I bet you are!!!
So I was super excited because not only was this my baptism weekend, but my twin was coming to visit! So she showed up Friday at around 3:30. Acting a little off but I didn’t know why until about 5 minutes later and there was a knock at my door. So I answered the door, and standing there was Catherine and Tiffany from my Africa trip! I was so incredibly shocked! Carrie had picked them up in Buffalo and dropped them off at the end of my street so they could surprise me. I was literally speechless for a good 5 minutes. I had NO idea they were coming. I was so surprised and amazed that they showed up!
So we just sat and relaxed for a bit but I really needed to get some groceries so we went to do that a couple hours later. We got back to my place and about 30 minutes later there was another knock at my door. So I opened it up, and standing at my door was Christina, Madison, and Blake…more of my Africa family. I didn’t know what to say. I was floored. I still am. All of this was arranged by my twin, and boy did she get me good. I still can’t believe that they were all here.
So we just hung out for a bit. Christina, Madison, and Blake were all staying at a hotel so they had to leave to check in. This was everyone’s first time visiting Canada so we decided to trek to Toronto on Saturday to see some sights. It was pretty snowy and cold, but we made it. Took them all to the CN tower even though the visibility was poor. They still got to see the glass floor. That was interesting to watch. We strolled through Kensington Market (it was my first time there and it was lovely!) and made the trek back home. Most of my family was coming over for dinner that night. I was just so excited for my two families to merge together and meet and laugh and be silly and all that fun stuff. I knew everyone would get along. I knew it was going to be amazing to just sit back and watch. Many times during the weekend, I just looked around at everyone and was just amazed. I really couldn’t believe that all these people were sitting in my living room. It was surreal.
So Sunday was the big day. I took them all to my church service, which was awesome and I think they enjoyed it. After that was over, we went to my Mom’s to help get everything ready for the party afterwards. So we just relaxed for a bit and then we made our way down to the lobby to meet the rest of the people who were coming. Once everyone arrived (almost 40 people!) we all made our way to the pool. Before I went out, I wanted to get together with my Africa family for a prayer before. I was so nervous, and emotional and just excited. To be able to share the moment with my family and friends was just so amazing. So off to the pool I went. Jimmy (the lead pastor from my Church) explained the meaning of baptism and then I had to say a few words. I wasn’t sure what to say, so I just started talking. I don’t even remember what I said. I was just trying so hard to keep it together because it was such an emotional moment for me. So once that was done, we jumped in the pool!!! Not the traditional baptism, but I’m not traditional so we just jumped in! Everything is still kind of a blur. Out of the pool I went, and then we all went upstairs to my Mom’s apartment for a little celebration. It was so nice to see everyone and celebrate this day with them. It was probably one of the happiest days of my life. You could definitly feel God’s presence there. It was such an amazing day. I didn’t want it to end. Christina, Madison, and Blake all flew out that evening, so they had to leave. It was hard to say goodbye. I just had flashbacks of saying goodbye at the airport after Africa, and it just made me sad.
C-High, T-Lew and my twin weren’t leaving until the next morning, so we just hung out the rest of the night and watched the Golden Globes. I didn’t want to go to sleep because I didn’t want to wake up and have to say goodbye again. But I did sleep, and I did say goodbye. It was tough.
It was a really emotional weekend for me. I was overwhelmed. That’s an understatement because I don’t think there are enough words to properly explain what it meant to me. I feel so incredibly blessed and loved. And grateful. Grateful for my family. Grateful for my amazing friends. Grateful that they traveled so long just to celebrate this day with me.
Sometimes I have difficulty with my emotions. Ok well most times haha. It’s just hard for me to express how I feel. I don’t really know why…I mean I know why…but I don’t know why. If you can decipher that, I give you props!!! Sometimes I talk myself into thinking that I don’t deserve to give or receive love. That I don’t deserve any good things that come my way. It’s stupid and I hate that I feel like that. But in the past year I’ve really…made some progress to try and change this part of me. My trip to Africa really kind of opened up my heart and since then, my journey has been all about me learning things about myself, and really believing in myself. My journey with God has helped me so much with this. I think about who I would be if I hadn’t allowed Him into my life. I think about the path I’m on now, and how I got here, and everything that’s happened in my life. I think about the person I want to become, and how I am going to make that happen. I think a lot. Too much. I have a lot of stuff going on in my head and it’s hard for me to make sense of it!! I am learning to love more and more everyday. That if I continue to protect my heart, I lose out on so many experiences. I am learning how to love fully and completelty, no matter the risk. It’s hard sometimes, but I have so much more to gain. I need to stop thinking about the risks, and just enjoy the moments. Enjoy the friendships. Enjoy this life. Trust in God’s plan and just let things happen.
I wouldn’t have gotten to this point on my own. I have so many people in my life that I am just so incredibly blessed to know. Incredibly. I could go on and on about them but hopefully, they know how I feel.
I know I am just starting this journey. That my walk with God is just beginning. I know there is so much more for me to accomplish. I cannot wait. I am just so lucky. No matter what life has thrown at me, I’ve always had people to catch me when I fall. Even if I refused to let them. Even if my own stubborness got in the way. I am ready now. Let this journey begin.
Just want to say a big thanks again – especially to my Twin. You are amazing. I can’t thank you enough for putting this whole thing together.
To my Africa family that made the journey. I love you guys. You’ll never know how much it meant to me that you came. Seriously. I am still at a loss for words. I still can’t beleieve you were all sitting in my living room. It made this weekend 100 times more special for me. That you’ve all accepted me for who I am and never made me feel anything other than loved.
To my Mom and Peter, who got everything in order for Sunday. Thank you so much. It was a lot of work and you did it with such ease.
To my family, you guys blow me away with your unconditional love and support for me. You never once questioned my decision, and just supported me 100%. I love you all so, so much.
To my friends that came out Sunday, again, thank you for celebrating with me.
To the rest of my Africa family that couldn’t make it, you are officially off my list of friends! Ha…I’m totally kidding. I wish you all could have been there, but you were not forgotten!
Thanks also to everyone who brought food, helped out in the kitchen, and made a donation to Home of Grace. THANK YOU!!!!
I am just bursting with love right now. Love for God. Love for my family. Love for my friends. Love for anyone who wants it.
I am lucky. I am blessed. I am flawed. I am learning. I am me.
In the words of my peeps: ‘Welcome to Heaven beotchhhhhhh’
Girlfriend be gettin dat cheddaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
